BP completely convinced that it’s going to work this time, honest!

Politician considering law to vet and certify journalists. We eagerly await a similar law for politicians.
Lotto winner blows through cash, returns to job as trash-man. Oh, like you’d spend it any better.

If you ever get an e-mail from a journalist, there’s one portion of it you should pay attention to more than any other. No, it’s not the part where they’re asking you about the counterfeit jeans operation you’re running out of your car hole; it’s the sign-off.
If it’s “Cheers,” you’re cool. You did OK. If it’s “Regards,” you pissed somebody off, and you better figure out how to fix things, quick.
We apply those same tenets here, every week.
CHEERS …

Michael Bay gives up all pretense, just straight up hires lingerie model for Transformers sequel.
Reading other people’s mail reportedly dissatisfying.
Gay people may soon be free to kill for their country, provided they don’t want to marry each other.
God apparently angry with Greece. Or it’s the mating season for frogs. Whichever.

One can learn several important things from crap-auteur Bill “Monster-a-Go-Go” Rebane’s 1987 film Twister’s Revenge! First, no matter how awesome one might think it is, taking the concept of Knight Rider and applying it to a monster truck is absolutely not awesome. Second, there is a good reason why some of the world’s greatest detectives–Jim Rockford, Starsky and Hutch, Hardcastle and McCormick, Tenspeed and Brownshoe, the Scooby Doo Gang–were not known for conducting their investigations with a monster truck. And third, monster truck action does not translate well to …

Summer is here, and much like last year, the buffet of blockbusters and crowd-pleasers before us seems both grim and meager. There are a few bright lights–The Killer Inside Me seems like such an unlikely release for June–but for the most part it’s a lot of noise and movies that don’t get screened for critics. (Honestly, studios, that sends only one message, and we all know it.)

A preview of the food that will soon be shortening your life-span.
Unemployed Law & Order writers are now screaming in fury.
Crack teams are already researching how to use this for porn.
Eleven deaths, environmental disaster, economic doom, all made better by person losing job. THE SYSTEM WORKS.

poll by twiigs.com

The planets have aligned again and Rockstar Games, the video game studio behind the groundbreaking, trend-setting Grand Theft Auto series, has given us Red Dead Redemption, a new entry in their Red Dead Western series and another prime demonstration of the “sandbox” style of game setting they pioneered.

“Haunted” house for sale.
Audience somehow surprised by disappointing Palin speech.
GOP to 9/11 responders: drop dead. No, seriously.
Surely THIS will work better than more funding for parole departments!